Oh hello WordPress, long time no see? Anyway, I really feel like I should post something. Even it seems weird about feeling the need to post, whatever. I’m currently in the first part of my exam week. A little anxious, stressed, rushing, and struggling with the unexpected feelings of life. I am working on my German classes now, and not regretting of to spend enough time. Guess being a nerd could be something like this. But good side on that and what people don’t get it mostly that, studying simply leads me to other things I’d love to learn. Anyway, what else is new?
In short: I worked a lot on myself and rediscovered my incredible passion for life. First, my grannies sickness made me realise how life could passed so so quick, while I was procrastinating through irreleveant things. I know I should post this blog with a special headlines for her but in everytime I try, pain failed me to write. I never thought I could lose her and my whole world was about to fall into my head. After heard her good news, with my highest thanks to God I decided to enjoy casual explorations of life more, to cook much more, spend more time with family, which could make my every day more precious.
I usually struggle to make myself calm but it doesn’t really matter because everything changes quickly. If I was writing this page 2-3 months ago, I would be desperately unhappy, as nothing had gone as I planned. At some point, I just made my way into this as things changes due to how we take them. If something is just not going, how you could possibly still insist to make it in your own way? Sadly, came to realise that mother nature is working very different. So, ‘just do what you think you should do and don’t think the rest’ theory seems the best. Making plans might give you more satisfied future,(or maybe not), however it simultaneously makes another thing: you’re forgetting every second has same value and deserve to be spended in best way.
However, a few things positively changed in the 24 years: I care about little details in life much more which makes me freak out some time, hence I believe it attaches me life more deeply. If whole human being process is about to experience something new, that we should further our knowledge with sharing our stories, thoughts, ideas, places, foods, books that we should help each other make memories and plans for a great future together.
By any means, I haven’t achieved all my battles, but I feel like I’m finally process moving towards very positive direction. I have accepted that my life is going to be imperfect, unique, and beautiful; my mission is just to make everyday can be more amazing than one before. This wordpress page is part of that project to rediscover myself and the world around me. Finally, cherry blossoms of this warm April days rock my world.